Over the weekend my husband decided to take the car out for a much needed clean up. We went to a local Shell across town. Keep in mind we chose this one because it would "get us out of the house." Please note, we passed two other fully functional places on the way to this one. It was as if we were going to "town" or something.
Vacuuming at these places is frighting. First you have this huge monstrous looking robot canister poised and ready to partake of your quarters and willing to return to you 15 seconds of suction. Maybe it's just me, but it feels like you've only vacuumed for that long after you maneuver, fight and some how get entangled into the coils of this gray octopus - a mutated over-sized hose with a way too tiny attachment. It is perfect for sucking the coins from your seat but not the dirt you've gone over 18 times.
While there, he decided to check the air pressure in his tires as they seemed a bit low. Firstly, I am sorry to say this, but I don't usually check for low tire pressure until I am on my knees in a posture that seems like I am praying to the lord of tires to re inflate my inappropriately timed flat. I watch him and I am intrigued by the meticulous and precise manner he checks the tires. However outwardly I don't let it show. (Note: my external posturing says "Yeah...I check that all the time.")
In any case, he uses the manual gage and the reading is ridiculously low. His air pressure was equal to riding on gas fumes praying to make it to the gas station. So the proclamation is made that surely the "manual gage has to be wrong because the number was too low." The truth was this he wanted to use.............WAIT FOR IT............WAIT FOR IT
THIS
NO MY FRIENDS: Your eyes are not playing tricks on you. It is indeed a very elaborate parking meter....no wait....it is the master of all air machines. It is a modern marvel and wonder....colorful buttons with multiple options to chose from (none of them marked, so we are left to guess). Who caress...it's so beautiful and new. (Cue any luxury car commercial music and repeat these words in the voice over: Sleek, elegant, updated and so awesome that it's free to use!). I am stoked and excited.....until (Skrunkxx -record being scratched).
Why is this thing $.75 for 40 seconds of air. Who decided it would be that price for that long? Is there some kind of strange anomaly that occurs if used for 20 seconds longer? Of course the time isn't marked and not known until you are running around your car like a wild person to refill your tires before the air stops.
Am I the only one who remembers that in the not too distant past that it was illegal for people to be charged for air? I mean come on now. Are they serious? Maybe there is an air shortage. NOT. As much hot air as people blow out on a daily basis, surely this can be pumped from the atmosphere and go directly into our tires....I am just saying. Ironically the this fabulous invention of modern mechanical wonderment had the exact same reading as the manual tire gauge. To it's credit though it filled your tires to the exact amount of pressure needed to get reading up to the standard. For a split second I was mesmerized by this, but then I remembered, when I manually put air in my tires, it usually slows down as it fills up.
This paying for air opens a whole new set of issues. I mean, are people going to have to be concerned with a huge rash of having the air siphoned from their tires because of the escalating cost of air? Will landfills be piled higher with discarded manual pressure gauges? What about the few remaining fee free machines at some gas stations, what about their safety...will they be overtaken, made over and forced to perform for money? Who will protect their rights?
I don't know about you, but I am outraged and appalled. When we left establishment, I felt cheated. I am on the lookout now. Next thing you know, they will charging me for the air I breath. I am just saying.
